Trimming the Fat

Years and years (and years) ago, the very first time I sat down to write a story, I couldn’t wait to tell the reader everything. I love complicated plots, and I wanted to show my reader everything that my main character didn’t know: events behind the scenes, the thought process of other characters and the bad guy(s), an overview of events happening in the present, how certain things worked, etc. Literally, everything that happened in the story, as well as a fair bit of research, was included. You can imagine the big mess I ended up with. :)

Eventually, I learned the importance of streamlining a story. In other words, if it’s going to be in the story, it has to drive it forward. If my characters go on a tangent that doesn’t impact the story, my reader is going to wonder why-are-we-here-and-can-we-get-on-with-it-already. So, after you’ve got your first draft down, it’s good to go through everything and streamline as best you can. Anything that doesn’t move the story forward is padding—a.k.a. story fat. You don’t need it, and it can actually work against you.

Here are some common areas that are often story fat:

Flashbacks.

This is often information that the author needs in order to mentally round out the story, but the reader doesn’t always need it. Often, the spirit of the flashback can be conveyed in the storytelling itself. I think a necessary flashback is extremely uncommon, so if you’ve got one then you might want to take a good, hard look as to whether or not it’s necessary.

Multiple POV.

This can manifest in many ways. Sometimes it’s a handful of characters, sometimes it’s akin to omniscience, sometimes it’s just a quick perspective from another character who’s not a main character. This can work, but it’s often not necessary. And, it’s really, really easy to go overboard with it. Use with care.

Certain aspects of the main character.

If my main character broke her toe in middle school but it doesn’t affect anything in her current story, then the reader doesn’t need to know. In fact, he doesn’t want to know. The only thing we, as readers, need to know is what affects her right here, right now. If that broken toe kept her from running to push her best friend out of the way of a speeding car, then we’ll need to know. Otherwise, keep it in your list of ‘fun facts.’

Certain events around the main character.

We don’t care if the main character was the last kid to lose his first tooth in grade school. Unless, of course, it led to a ridiculous nickname, which he hates. Then we might want to know…maybe. We also don’t care if he was born in Cincinnati but grew up in San Diego. Unless something happened to him or his family in Cincinnati that is still affecting them in San Diego, it doesn’t matter. The only things that matter are what’s affecting him here and now.

I think many writers, in their excitement to tell their story, end up telling too much of it. In this case, less is often more—but it takes time, practice, and a healthy serving of objectivity to see it. A good critique partner (or group) can speed this up some. :) Disclaimer: don’t worry about trimming any fat in the first draft. Your first draft is basically a brain dump of your story, and you don’t need to worry about what’s important and what’s not. That’s what revision is for. :)

Challenge: Plot-Driven or Character-Driven?

Last week, I wrote a post on the pros and cons of multiple points of view, as well as effective ways of creating more than one viewpoint. Then Jenn Hubbard came out and said what had been in the back of my mind the whole time:

“I think multiple narrators is a device that has become much more common in recent years. And, to be honest, I'd like to see writers rely on it a little less.”

I wholeheartedly agree. And, Jenn, I always love your comments. :)

I think many writers, particularly those just starting out, tend to rove from character to character because it feels like you’re getting more of your story out there. Which, I guess, you are. But at what expense?

Like Jenn, I’ve seen multiple points of view become more common lately. And, like Jenn, I often wish the story had stayed with one character instead of several. But it’s not necessarily because I think the story didn’t work—I just think it could have been better. Too many points of view can lessen the impact on the reader, and your subtext can get lost along the way. Also, having so many characters share their thoughts and opinions can overwhelm the reader, risking the loss of his interest. A good story has a good balance of everything, and sometimes attaining that balance requires sticking to a single viewpoint.

Staying in one point of view can be difficult, especially if you’ve got a complicated plot. The more complicated the plot, the harder it is to pull off with only one viewpoint. I think many plot-driven books have more than one point of view for this reason, where the character-driven books stay with one person. It’s just easier. But is it going to bring out the best possible aspects of your story?

For any of you interested, here’s a challenge. Make a list of your top ten books with multiple points of view. Just for fun, see if you can determine whether each story is plot-driven or character-driven. Next, try to imagine the story in only one viewpoint. Does it work? If you’re really up for a challenge, then turn this into a writing exercise and create an outline of that story using only one viewpoint. Do you still have a complete story? My guess is that, at least for some of them, you will.

For your own story, is it plot-driven or character-driven? If it’s character-driven, you probably have one point of view. If not, you might have more than one. And, if that’s true, then I have another challenge for you. Try writing your story from one person’s perspective. If that sounds incredibly daunting or impossible, well, all I have to say is this: that’s good. And, no, I’m not evil or masochistic or anything of the sort. :) It’s good because that means taking on this challenge will push you out of your comfort zone, and many many many amazing things can come of that. :)

Who’s up for the challenge?

How Many Is Too Many?

Two years ago, I wrote a post about multiple points of view in a story. I still hold by what I said—basically, for each main character he’ll need his own path to change—but there are some other things that have been bouncing around in my head lately, starting with this question. Why do you need multiple points of view?
Everything in a story is there for a reason. This character. Those actions. That specific word. So, if a story is told from more than one point of view, there needs to be a good reason for that. As in, if you took one of those viewpoints away, the story would feel incomplete. There has to be something that all viewpoints add to the story that you can’t get if you only had one. It’ll add a layer of depth and richness to your story.

On that same note, though, you have to be careful. Too many viewpoints can make your story feel repetitive. Especially if you’re going to go over similar concepts with each character, getting his/her unique viewpoint on them. Yes, it’s unique and it adds something to the story that a single viewpoint can’t, but it can also feel like going around the room and asking everyone their opinion on X, Y, and Z. Each person is going to have a unique answer, and we’ll have a well-rounded idea of how people see those concepts—which, granted, is far better than asking just one person. But, in the end, you still only have an exploration of X, Y, and Z. A story’s momentum could suffer if you spend so much time exploring the same concepts in different ways.

Along those same lines, exploring similar concepts in various ways can also make your story feel a bit diluted. Zeroing in on one or two aspects of a concept can make a huge impact on your reader. Expressing several aspects can wash it out, making it seem like it doesn’t matter which aspect is presented because they all are. So, even if you have multiple points of view, your story might be more effective if you don’t give everyone’s reactions to every aspect of the story. Instead, focus on what you want your story to convey, and then choose the character that matches that.

Here’s a list of books that I thought used multiple points of view effectively:
The Amulet of Samarkand by Jonathan Stroud
Skin Hunger & Sacred Scars by Kathleen Duey
Jekel Loves Hyde by Beth Fantaskey
Across the Universe by Beth Revis
Shiver by Maggie Stiefvater
Blue Plate Special by Michelle Kwasney
The Underneath by Kathi Appelt
Looks by Madeleine George
Sliding on the Edge by C. Lee McKenzie

Harmless by Dana Reinhardt

Plot Summary: One friday night, Emma, Anna, and Mariah, three best friends, are out doing something they shouldn’t. They make up a story so they won’t get in trouble at home. It seems like the easy way out. What happens next challenges their friendship, their community, their relationships with their families, and their sense of themselves. What happens next shows the harm one lie can do.

I’ve read one other book by Dana Reinhardt, and didn’t care for it much. But I never let that deter me from reading other books by the same author. After all, she could have written something very different that I might want to read over and over. So, I picked up HARMLESS with a completely open mind and ready to fall in love.

Unfortunately, I didn’t. After this happens twice, then I begin to think my tastes don’t mesh with this particular author. So, keep this in mind as you read this review.

As with all my book discussions, there are SPOILERS below (that give away the ending of the book).

This story is told via three points of view: Anna’s, Emma’s, and Mariah’s, and they tell a lie about a strange man attempting to rape Emma (there was no man - they were lying to avoid getting into trouble). The story started off okay, and it was interesting to see the girls' different perspectives . But, as events unfolded, the multiple points of view actually put me off. I felt like I was missing too much with the switch from character to character. Especially when the big things happened toward the end, and we only got one character’s perspective on it.

For example, when the girls are arrested after the truth has surfaced, we only hear Anna's account of it. But this is such a huge thing that I felt cheated out of how the other two girls handled this situation. Especially Emma, since she's the one who got them all arrested. I wanted to know if she felt vindicated, or if she'd made the biggest mistake ever.

To me, this really felt like Emma’s story. It was Emma’s idea to lie about the attempted rape, and then it was Emma who confessed the truth to the police. She didn’t consult Anna or Mariah beforehand, nor did she seem to consider how her confession would affect them. Yet, we never fully understand her reasons behind the confession. Granted, we see that she’s in turmoil and falling into something like depression, and we can kind of understand why. She had sex and wasn’t ready for it, she made up a story that painted her as a sexual victim, and now she’s seeing looks of pity mixed with fear everywhere.

This is where I believe the real story is. A girl proposing an outrageous lie to avoid a simple grounding, then having that lie turn on her and make her life miserable? That's a riveting premise. Anna and Mariah had their own story lines, of course, with character changes and separate paths to the conclusion. But, in the end, they just weren’t interesting enough. Emma’s inner turmoil overshadowed them in a very big way.

I think that if this story had been told solely through Emma’s perspective, I would have loved it. And, I think the multiple points of view made it more complicated than necessary. In the world of good stories, less is more. :)

Too Many Cooks in the Kitchen or a Well-Run System of Chefs?

Sorry for the lateness of this post. After I finish a draft, I always take a ‘vacation’ from my computer for a week or two. I’ve had posts scheduled up to today, and I realized this morning that I never finished the one for today.

Anyway, today I wanted to talk about using multiple points of view in a novel. I see writers asking about this technique in forums, critique meetings, conferences, basically everywhere. The question I see most often is “I know it’s considered a no-no to use multiple points of view, but do I *have* to stick to just one person?”

This often prompts the same reaction from me. Why is it that a lot of writers think we’re not supposed to use more than one point of view? It’s obviously possible, because there are some great books out there with more than one main character. Two good examples are THE SISTERHOOD OF THE TRAVELING PANTS series and SKIN HUNGER by Kathleen Duey.

I’ve never been tempted to write a story from more than one point of view. Why? Well, to be honest, it scares the daylights out of me. More than one point of view means more than one major plot line, as well as more than one path of character growth. Also, the multiple plot lines and character growth need to mesh with the overall story, not unlike a series or trilogy.

But the most daunting concept in multiple points of view is that each character must have his own story.

For example, in SISTERHOOD, each of the girls’ experiences, reactions, and growth is unique. The threads connecting them are the pants, and the fact that they are spending their first summer apart. In SKIN HUNGER, Hahp and Sadima don’t even live in the same time frame, so their stories are so completely different. Yet, there is an underlying thread of magic, as well as two characters, connecting them.

Lisa Yee did something close to multiple points of view with her MILLICENT MIN series. It’s the same story told three different times, through three different characters. I think that if she’d put all three points of view into one novel, it wouldn’t have worked. The reader probably would have tired of hearing the same thing over and over, even though it was from a different perspective. Instead, she changed the main character with each book, retelling the same story, and allowing us to form a connection to each character. Very effective.

I think the reason a lot of writers think they can’t use multiple points of view is that it’s hard to do right. That is, it’s easy to head-hop from character to character so you can get every aspect of your story across, such as things going on that the main character doesn’t know about. But, is it *really* necessary for the reader to know so much so quickly? If the reader doesn’t learn these aspects of the story until the main character does, it creates a stronger bond between the two. Then the reader can feel whatever emotion the main character experiences, and the story ends up having a greater impact. It’s harder to write this way, but it’s also much more effective.

This is mainly why I didn’t care for the SEPTIMUS HEAP series. I assumed the main character would be Septimus Heap (since the series is named after him), but he didn’t even make an appearance until several chapters in to the first book. And, once he did, we heard nothing from him until the end. It left me scratching my head, and I never picked up the next book.

Anyway, I think Cheryl Klein said it best at last year’s SCBWI –IL conference: for multiple main characters, each must undergo his own change or internal plot. Otherwise that character isn’t necessary. So, if you are thinking of writing a story with multiple main characters, ask yourself this. Are you ready or willing to put multiple plots within one story, and then tie them all together? If not, then perhaps you have a single viewpoint story.

Looks by Madeleine George

As with all my book discussions, there are some SPOILERS below.

I love the idea of opposites attracting. That’s what drew me to this book. The main characters are Meghan Ball, a very overweight teenager, and Aimee Zorn, an anorexic. This is an interesting story of how these two unlikely teenagers become friends.

I thought the characterization strategies used in this book were intriguing. Aimee’s character was very clear from the time she was introduced. Her point of view is third person limited – we get right into her head and never leave it. Her voice is very clear, so we always know instantly when it’s her turn to tell her story. We get to know her family life, as well as what motivates her. She’s very real, leaps off the page, and I really felt for her when things started to go wrong.

Meghan’s story is a bit different. In school, she’s practically invisible. Ironic, since she’s so large. But people just don’t notice her presence. As a result, she overhears much more than the speakers intend, simply because they don’t realize she’s there. It’s like she has an omniscient point of view regarding nearly everyone around her. To draw on that, the point of view chosen to tell Meghan’s story has a touch of omniscience – we’re inside her head, yet we’re always just a little outside, too.

The writer geek in me loves the idea of drawing a parallel between the omniscience Meghan experiences and the omniscience the reader experiences. But the practical side of me can’t help but notice the limitations. We’re never fully inside Meghan’s head. We don’t ever see her family life from her point of view – and her family doesn’t even enter the picture until near the end. We’re kept a certain distance from her, which made it harder for me to both sympathize and relate to her. And I really, really wanted to do both of these things.

Because of this lack of sympathy, it made the book’s resolution a little hard to digest. Meghan exacts revenge on one of her classmates. In order to understand her motivations, I needed to be able to feel how she’d been hurt. How she felt she’d been wronged. But that element was missing, so it made her seem a little petty. Had her role been switched with Aimee, I’m sure I would have understood everything and sympathized accordingly. But, in the end, it came down to Meghan. So, while I still liked the story, I didn’t enjoy it as much as I wanted to.

From a writer’s perspective, this is a really cool book to read. In just one story, you can get effective examples of third person limited and third person omni. And you can see how one measures up against the other.